SATIRE: New Year New Me?
This year, I am a new version of myself. Last year was only a week ago and I am leaving every bad habit in 2022. I recently read the book Atomic Habits by James Clear. He said that it takes 21 days to...
View ArticleSatire: Students Declare Winter Break Much too Long
A petition has circulated on WSU’s Pullman campus to demand that the administration decrease the length of Winter Break by two weeks. Carly Dubbs, a senior in microbiology, was adamant that while the...
View ArticleSatire: Squirrel uprising is getting out of hand
They are always in such a hurry to go somewhere until they see a human and freeze entirely. I have a feeling that they might be hiding something behind those beady little eyes of theirs. Squirrels are...
View ArticleSatire: Are We Sure Pullman is Cold Enough?
I was walking to the weekly staff meeting for The Daily Evergreen when I posed an important question to myself: “Are we sure Pullman is cold enough?” I mean, it only felt like the Arctic when I was...
View ArticleSatire: Text your ex this Valentine’s Day
Timing when to text your ex-partner is something many people spend way too much time thinking about. Many poor souls will spend weeks or even months contemplating whether to text their ex, but when is...
View ArticleV-day a day for loneliness and self care
One of the most humbling experiences of my life was filling out the FAFSA when I first got into WSU. My dad and I were trudging through the brutally long process when I came across “the question.” It...
View ArticleSATIRE: Pullman disposal messes with student sleep
Recent changes to the Pullman trash collection cycle have left many residents both frustrated and appalled. With trucks storming through the streets as early as 3 a.m. and as late as 5 a.m., locals...
View ArticleSatire: ‘the French’ don’t actually exist
In a now-deleted Tweet, the Associated Press (AP) deemed “the” French as a term to be avoided according to the updated AP style guide. The AP cautioned against using the word “the” before a myriad of...
View ArticleSATIRE: Don’t worry about the spy balloon!
I’m sure by now you have all heard about the spy balloon that was cruising across the good ole U. S. of A. off the coast of South Carolina a couple of weeks ago. If I were you, I wouldn’t worry about...
View ArticleSatire: I am turning 21
Well, dear readers, this week marks the start of the rest of my life. I am at the ripe old age of 21. I already know what you’re going to say. “Really? The guy who writes about 1980s music and culture...
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